Dreams can come true

Wow! It’s been a while since I’ve written.  But you knew that already. I got back from my vacation a few days ago and boy was it a needed one.  I feel so renewed and refreshed.  Good thing too because as soon as I got back I had to get back to the grind with an addition.  I’m finally in culinary school to carry out my dream of becoming a world renown pastry chef.

So I’m super happy at this moment in time.  The happy music in my ear and by that I mean my head has been a few songs. One of the song being “Celebration” by Kool and the Gang.  I have been waiting for this moment for a very long time.  Those who know me very well know how passionate I am about baking and learning more about the craft of creating pastries and sweets.  So to finally be on the road to carry out my dream has been a means for celebration.  And I have been, well, in my own way.

Another happy happy joy joy song(no not that one) I’ve had in my mind is the song “Dreams Can Come True” by Gabrielle.  Sure her song is about her feelings for some guy.  For me I’ve taken it and applied it to my feelings and passion for my dream and for my future.  She says ‘you’ve got to have hope’ in there somewhere and I look back on a few times where I had completely lost that.  It is not a place in my life I enjoyed.  Not a feeling I ever want to feel again.  When you don’t have hopes and dreams you really don’t have anything.

And a completely cheesy yet appropriate song that has been springing to my mind is the song from “Karate Kid”.  Joe Esposito’s “You’re the Best Around” is totally going to be my theme song throughout school.  I told the entire class and all my teachers that my goal was to be the best.  I am dead serious about it too.  I don’t care how many hours I have to put in, how many seemingly stupid questions I’ll have to ask or how long I have to keep both myself and my instructors around the campus until I get what I want out of us both.  I will be the best pastry chef ever.  Book it.  I have.

I’m gonna do my best to maintain my schedule of posting as I go through school.  Though being a chef is my dream, I love writing too.  So I’ll see how I feel once I really get going.  I may have to put this on hiatus if things get to hectic.  Hope those of you who actually read this can forgive me for that.  But the dream comes first.

PSA Away

Due to the fact that I will be gone for a while on an actual vacation, there will be no Musical Mashup post til I get back.  Not sure what the internet situation will look like otherwise I would have still attempted to post.  Until then go out there and continue observing how music impacts your life and how much you love it.

When You Believe

Yesterday was one of the greatest days of my life.  I finally swallowed my fear and quieted my doubts long enough to trust God and get into the culinary school I’ve been dreaming about going to for the past 2 years.  It feels so amazing.  I feel amazing.  The thing(meaning money or lack thereof) that stopped me last time and every other time afterwards didn’t stop me this time.  Sure I have to come up with $5k somehow.  But stressing over it and pulling back is like playing Russian roulette with my future.

I’m writing this post at 4:30 in the morning because I was awoken by an inspiring song that captures my situation almost perfectly.  I don’t remember too much about the movie “The Prince of Egypt”, but I know very well one of the songs on the soundtrack.  Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey singing the song “When You Believe” is an appropriate tune to describe how I’m feeling right now.

I have been so blindsided by lack of cash that it has controlled all my thoughts and dictated all my actions.  This has caused me to waste a lot of years by doing absolutely nothing.  As a woman of faith it has gotten all the easier to quiet my thoughts and trust in the higher power and not hinder what He’s trying to do for me.  Before I didn’t allow myself to believe such things.  But as I’ve discovered it makes things so much easier and helps me be a lot more decisive a lot sooner.  And make those decisions without fear.

So yes, I now have another $5k worth of debt.  But I believe that I will get done what I need to do to obtain it.  There are too many resources out there, too many people that I know that believe in me and my dream that I can make it.  And with the Lord on my side all those things will come together for me.  It’s not going to be immediate and it’s not going to be easy.  But it’s not supposed to be.  Like with anything it’s going to take a lot of hard work from me.  Which I know I have the skill and the ability to do.  What’s different now is that I have the right mindset which has given me the drive and the determination.

I am bent on making my dream come true.  I am now comfortable with exercising my faith to do it.  It has proven to work.  I’ve seen it.  I’m not going to allow anyone, especially myself. to sway me from this truth.  Things happen if you pray on it, work on it, and believe in it.  As long as I hold on to this nothing is going to stop me from achieving the greatness I know I was meant to show the world.

Hit ‘em with the Kenny G

I was going through some of my youtube playlist and came across some commercials that I really liked and I came across the Audi commercial that had Kenny G in it.  That one cracks me up so much.  It made me think though on my childhood.  When I was a kid, my parents listened to Kenny G all the time.  I don’t remember if it was something that I appreciated back then or not, but I do remember that it made me sleepy.

So I’ve been listening to Kenny G today, for the most part.  I like listening to him.  His music is calming to me.  And I am in awe of his saxophone playing skills.  As a girl who really digs true musicians, he is a breath of fresh air.  Makes me wish I really took my own musical talent to another level.  Alas, I’ve the curse of perpetually unmotivated.

Lots of people I’ve noticed tend to hate on the guy.  I don’t know, I guess it’s trendy right now, but I don’t understand why.  Has current music trends de-evolved to the point that instrumental music is unworthy of being appreciated?  To me that is a grotesque train of thought.  And depressing.  I really wish that there were more artists like him out there.  I don’t know off the top of my head anyone else that does what he does.

The man is a true maestro.  I love that he writes music and plays multiple instruments.  I didn’t realize that he was still making new music.  I am tempted to buy a lot of his stuff right now, but priorities.  So far, I’m really liking his earlier works.  Thanks to the Audi commercial, I started with “Songbird” and worked my way back from that.  I still have a lot of music to listen to so I can’t say an opinion on his progression.

I am impressed that he has been around for as long as he has.  Been making music professionally since the 70s.  So he’s seen a lot of music trends.  I’m glad that in a constantly changing industry he has found a nice niche for himself that makes him unique and interesting.  He’s one of the few music acts around now days that I would love to go see in concert.  This is coming from a person that has only been to one concert ever(hate going to concerts).  I’m that impressed with him.

My search for the gospel

So I didn’t do a post last Thursday.  To be quite honest I was just too darn preoccupied to think about writing about anything.  For future reference There may not be too many posts this month as I will be gone on vacation and won’t have the ability to write or post anything.

Now that that announcement is made on with the post.  I’ve been feeling really down lately.  Like really down.  To the point where I feel like I’m self destructing.  I have been talking with a lot of the new people that I’ve met since I’ve started going to church.  And they suggested of course to read my Bible, but also to listen to more spiritual music.

I have absolutely no idea about spiritual music.  I listen to gospel music very rarely so I wouldn’t even know where to begin.  I know growing up I was surrounded by it.  My grandfather always listened to it and so did my father.  But as I was uninterested in I didn’t pay attention to any of it.  Quite honestly this is something I’m gonna need some help with.

I don’t know where to begin.  I’m aware that a new genre of hip hop type gospel has surfaced in recent years.  I don’t know if I want to go with this new modern stuff or grand epic depressing Catholic or old school.  The closest thing I have to anything even remotely gospel message like is MC Hammer doing “Pray” and “Do Not Pass Me By”.

There are so many different artists and styles I don’t know who to listen to.  I’m seriously overwhelmed with this.  At this rate I may have to call in the big guns and speak to my grandfather.  I could have asked the people I go to church with, but I haven’t been there in a week and a half.  I’ll continue this when I find something.

Grim Grinning Ghosts

I’m not sure where this sudden Disney phase is coming from.  Maybe I need to go rent a few movies or something.  I don’t know.  But fate is playing its hand in favor of the house of mouse.  My Ipod strikes again as always as I will now discuss the latest random find.

So I was attempting to sleep and had my music playing when “Grim Grinning Ghosts” comes on.  For those who don’t know this song is played somewhere during the Haunted Mansion attraction at Disney Land/World.  I don’t know if the song has changed or  been updated over the years, but I have the version that was obviously used in the very beginning.  Listening to the song proves how dated it is.  It’s so 1950s.  Which is what I find most charming about it.  The music, the way it’s arranged, the way the song is sang, it’s so campy.

I think I picked this up from the library at some point.  I can’t imagine where else I could have gotten this.  It had a story attached to it.  It basically tells about all the things you’ll see inside the attraction and wove an actual plot around them.  It’s short.  About 24 minutes long.  It’s actually pretty funny.  I’m glad I have it.  It’s like my own personal story time.

I don’t recall ever being creeped out by the Haunted Mansion.  After listening to the story and the song, it’ll be even harder as I’ll always have something to refer back to if I ever wind up at Disney ever again.  I always look forward to the hitchhikers at the end.

“If you would like to join our jamboree,
There’s a simple rule that’s compulsory.
Mortals pay a token fee.
Rest in peace, the haunting’s free.
So hurry back, we would like your company.“

Lyrics owned by DisneyCorp.

This kiss…well maybe

Darn right I like Faith Hill!  I like country music.  She makes great music.  So it should be no surprise that I was jamming to one of her older songs.  And it was just the thing I needed to perk myself up since today I’ve been in pretty much of a deep spiraling funk.

“This Kiss” is so upbeat and peppy and happy and full of love, it’s impossible to stay depressed after hearing it.  If you find a way, then I have nothing to tell you.  It worked wonders for me.  With my Ipod on random, I wasn’t expecting to hear it at all.  It took me til my first listen through it that I was singing along with it.  I was totally unaware of it, so busy doing what I was doing.  Put it on repeat after that.

Sure it’s a song that I can’t relate to in any form.  I really wish I could.  It doesn’t detract from the greatness of the song.  My first kiss came to me when I was in 8th grade.  Needless to say I remember it as one of the most awkward and mortifying moments in my life that I look back on.  It’s a memory that kind of sadly affects me now.  After that of course there was more kissing and more boys/men.  That feeling of awkwardness never left me.  As a result I see myself as a terrible one.  It’s pretty ego crushing.

This song I can at least pretend that kissing is an awesome, not a horrible stomach turning experience.  I hear songs and I read books about it and I feel happy little butterflies in my stomach from those.  I’m pretty sure how I would feel if I was either, A: Good at it, B: didn’t really think about it so bad or C: Cared about the person I was engaged in it with.  I’m pretty sure, but can’t say for sure.  At the rate I’m going I may never know.  Oh well.  That’s another crisis for another day.

 

Wishing Disney returns to its musical roots

I can’t believe I wasted an entire day.  I work nights so I tend to have a pretty wonky schedule.  So I sleep during the day.  Last night I didn’t work, but I was still up all night and most of the morning.  I woke up and saw it was dark thinking it was raining.  Nope!  It’s 8pm.  Oh God.  I can’t believe it.  I had stuff I wanted to do today.  So much for seizing the day.

And that statement quite literally made me think of that song from Disney’s “Newsies”. ‘Open the gates and seize the day.  Don’t be afraid and don’t delay’.  Yeah.  I completely missed that today.  Luckily listening to this song which is so happy and upbeat makes me feel a lot better.  Not about my wasted day, but better than I was before.  That’s what great musical numbers do.  And this is something I think Disney has forgotten.

I don’t remember much about “Newsies”.  I know that Bill Pullman(LONESTAR!!) was in it.  What I do know after coming across it again is that this is an era of Disney that I really miss.  I miss those old live action musical films that they did.  Now that they’ve found ‘success’ in the action genre, I wonder if they’ll ever do a musical again.

I mean, with “Mary Poppins” and “The Lion King” being on broadway now and finding huge critical success, it’s not that their aren’t people out there that appreciate musicals.  I recognize that not everyone is a musical genre lover.  I don’t expect people to be.  But I am one and there are people like me.  Lots of them.  And I feel that our desires to see great musicals are being very much ignored.  Especially from Disney who used to be the king of musical.  At least in my mind.

I don’t want to get into my feelings about “High School Musical” and the reign of terror that it strikes whenever I come across it.  But I have no choice.  “High School Musical”, the first one anyway, was admittedly a solid modern day musical.  The story made sense, the musical numbers were well done and it was cute all around.  Yes.  I enjoyed the first one.  The others not so much.  By that point they were just milking the cash cow dry and I did not appreciate that.  They expected people to love it because it was “HSM” and not because it was any good.

I wrote about “The Slipper and the Rose” a few weeks ago.  Though not Disney it was a musical from my childhood that I remember fondly.  I hadn’t seen it a lot as a kid, but I sure did remember a lot of the songs.  I miss that kind of thing.  Now days, you don’t see too many musicals that people will be able to look back on with a smile in their heart.  And I find that quite sad.

Dear Disney, Do all your musical fans a huge favor and turn back the clock.  Go back to the days when you were awesome and made awesome and thoughtful musical movies that everybody loved and enjoyed.  We miss them and dream of seeing them again.  Done with the care and thought and professional reverence that made you guys household names in the first place and not what you guys are doing now.  We’d appreciate it.  Thanks.  Sincerely, You’re musical lovers.

The Bieber Experiement

When did Justin Bieber emerge for the first time?  I think it’s been a little while.  While I won’t say I hate the kid, I will say I find the hype surrounding him a little disturbing.  Hype of any kind bothers me most of the time.  Especially when it’s to the point where in this case we have people calling themselves ‘Bielibers’.  It’s pure insanity.

I’m a music lover first and foremost.  I’m not going to bash people on what they like.  Or don’t like.  Musical taste are individual and subjective.  A persons own connection with whatever they decide to listen to is all that matters.  So while it may be trendy and cute right now to bash people because they like his music, at the end of the day it’s not cool.  If you are mocking these people because they are rabid fans to the point of idiocy, then go ahead.  They at times forget how to act like humans and deserve that.

I have gone up until this past Sunday without hearing even one of his songs.  I haven’t watched his videos, heard his songs in passing, on the radio or out and about.  When I’m at home I’m listening to all the things I listened to growing up, video game music and music that I come across that’s interesting.  In my car, I’m on oldies and classic rock.  So it makes sense that I haven’t heard anything from him.  I see him everywhere, but I’ve still managed to avoid him, somehow.

So this past Sunday, I’m getting off work and decided to go to one of my favorite hole in the wall joints to grab some breakfast.  I place my order and I’m waiting for my food when this song comes up.  It’s not a song I’ve ever heard before.  It’s a slow song.  It’s has a great melody and the person singing has a beautiful voice.  The guy behind the counter immediately runs to the ipod hookup and changes the song.  I was confused and a bit annoyed at this because I was feeling the music.  So I ask him who was singing the song he changed.  His answer hit me like a cold wet blanket.

I can’t say for sure what I expected when I thought of Justin Biebers music, but I was not expecting that.  At 33 there was about a minute of feelings of shame and filthiness to me because Oh My God, I was just grooving to a Justin Bieber song.  A whole minute.  Because barring who it was singing the song, the fact of the matter was that I liked it.  I liked it.  No harm no foul, move along, nothing to see here.  I should have asked him what the name of the song was.  Since then I can hear that melody lingering in the back of my mind.  I’d actually like to hear the rest of the song.  Just so I can decide if it’s something I want to keep in my head or forget about completely.

I’ve listened to a few of his songs trying to figure it out.  I still haven’t found it and none of his other songs have grabbed me like that one.  But I will say this…the guy is talented.  Like it or not, he is, and his detractors will never be able to take that away from him.  He is doing what he loves and is getting paid for it.  The American dream at work.  He does not deserve all the visceral amounts of hate that comes his way.  As long as he continues to provide what people want, no one can say anything to him unless they are going to step up to the mic and provide something better.

Just the way I am

I started working out recently.  Like on the regular.  I have such a bad body image about myself.  And it’s shameful because a lot of people tell me that I’m very cute.  Well, today I actually believed some of those people.  And lo and behold, my confidence booster is over 9000!!  This whole changing of mindset thing has been challenging.  But over all I think I have become a better person for it.

That said, I found a song that I think I will listen to every day for the next couple of weeks.  One the way home I heard the song “Just the Way You Are” by Bruno Mars.  I’ve heard the song before, but I never knew who it was.  I also only just listened to it with half an ear.  Today I really listened to it and it just made my confidence soar a little higher.

I actually have that person who tells me that I’m beautiful, amazing and perfect as I am, but like most women I can’t take a compliment.  But after hearing that, I think that will be my theme and mantra for a while.  It made me feel so good.  And I like feeling good.  You act and think differently when you do.  It’s not something I do nearly enough.

So as I continue my journey to self improvement, I’ll have a great song that I can turn to to remind me that I am a great person, because I am me.  There is no one else like me(thank goodness :p) and that I am truly amazing just as I am right now.  It’s time for me to accept the truth for what it is.